A Look Through My Window

As we bring 2018 to a close, I look back on my 2018 year to evaluate what I have accomplished and what I need to improve upon. Are you a goal-setter? Have you mapped out your goals and how to achieve those goals? There will be times where you succeed and more times you fail, but what have you learned from your success AND your failures?

As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.” His teachers told him growing up he was too stupid to learn anything, but did he let that stop him from being a great inventor? Walt Disney’s editors told him he ‘lacked imagination and had no good ideas.’

“Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.” ~ Confucius ~

Business Insider published an article July 9, 2015, written Rachel Sugar, Richard Feloni and Ashley Lutz that said “Some of the world’s most successful people have failed – sometimes more than once.” They write that ‘Oprah Winfrey was publicly fired from her first television job as an anchor in Baltimore for getting “too emotionally invested in her stories.” Do you know what she is worth today, $3 billion according to Forbes Magazine.

Oprah Winfrey was publicly fired from her first television job as an anchor in Baltimore for getting “too emotionally invested in her stories.”

“Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world. One fails toward success.”  ~ Charles Kettering ~

“Failure provides the opportunity to begin again, more intelligently.”  ~ Henry Ford ~

“The fastest way to succeed is to double your failure rate.”  ~ Thomas Watson Sr. ~

Many great people failed before they reached their success and many people let their failures stop them from their goals. What we all need to realize is that our “failures, as we see them” are only stepping stones to our success. Can we all look at our failures as stepping stones? Many of us beat ourselves up from them and let it effect our self-esteem. I know it has taken me all of my life to teach myself to use may failures to my advantage. I have let my failures tell me that “I’m not smart or good enough to succeed,” or “I’m not qualified enough to accomplish this.”

“If somebody offers you an amazing opportunity but you are not sure  you can do it, say yes-then learn how to do it later.” ~Richard Branson ~

Have you ever taken a leap of faith, in yourself, and said yes to something you had no idea what you were doing? That scares me just thinking about it, but what if you actually did it? If you fail will that make you feel less about yourself, or will you learn from it and try again with the intention of success?

Jim Rohn developed his library to “be successful.” He admitted that he had not read some of the books in his library, at the time, but his goal was to read every day. Fill your library for YOUR success. Never stop learning new and better ways to reach your goal, then build on your goal. This will be a daily thing. You will always find new and better ways to make your goals better. With our society today, there are always updates and newer and better ways to do something. Be that person to improve on your goals. You learn from your failures and you MUST learn from your successes.

Do you plan to make new resolutions for 2019? Do you have a mapped out path to reach your goals? Do not be afraid to learn from others mistakes and failures. Always remain humble and know there are ALWAYS new and better ways to do anything. Do you want to lose weight? That always seems to be the new years resolution for most people, but come February 1st, they have given up on their new years resolution. Find your “WHY” for your goals. Do you want to lose weight to quit taking the high blood pressure pill? Do you want to start eating healthy because you have high cholesterol, or even better yet – a diabetic.

Simon Sinek wrote a great book, “Start With WHY.” Such a great book to begin your new year with and WHY you want to accomplish your goals. Do you know WHY you want to achieve your goals? Get the book and read it, then write down your goals you want to achieve for 2019. Know your WHY with each goal. Realize you WILL fail with some of your goals, but will that stop you? It didn’t stop Thomas Edison or Oprah Winfrey. No not look at your failures as “FAILURES,” look at them as “STEPPING STONES TO SUCCESS.”

Tell me ONE of your goals for 2019 and WHY you are passionate about that goal. I have worked in the medical field for approximately 20 years. I am a critical care paramedic currently working for a company who services major orthopedic practices and I am a care provider who works in triage. You are having problems with pain or your surgery site, I take care of that. I have been out of the field for over six years. Recently, I have had the opportunity to get back into the field, this time on the helicopter. My self esteem is down some because I have been out of the field for awhile and my skills are rusty, so my first goal is to get to the weight I need to be so I can fly on the helicopter. There are weight and balances when you fly on a helicopter or fixed wing in the medical field and if you are over that weight limit, you don’t fly. So, that’s my first goal. My WHY is I love making a difference in peoples lives. I love to help and make things better. It does not always work out that way, but most times just holding their hand and reassuring them they are not alone and you will do everything you can to make them better makes all the difference.

So, what is your goal and why is that your goal? What is the first thing you will do to make it happen? Let me know…

I love to motivate people and I love to read anything that will motivate me. One of my favorite emails I receive is from Success.com. It is packed full of motivation and self-help information. I came across this article, https://www.success.com/10-toxic-people-you-should-avoid/?mpweb=574-7509197-742764265, that got me thinking, “Do I have toxic people in my life?” Well, the answer to that questions is YES…

I love quotes, and Travis Bradberry, the author of this article wrote a quote from Hans F. Hansen; “People inspire you, or they drain you – pick them wisely.” I think we all have those people who “drain us,” I know I do. But how do you deal with them? Do you shut down, like I sometimes do, or do you carry it with you and stress over it? Travis Bradberry writes, “toxic people drive your brain into a stressed-out state that should be avoided at all costs.” So, how do you avoid them when they are your family? Travis Bradberry goes on to say, “that stress can have a lasting, negative impact on the brain.” Do we use that “negative impact on the brain” to help us become a better person, or do we just do that, have a negative impact? For a long time in my life, I let things have a negative impact on me, for which I did not learn from them until I reached a more “mature” age. Looking back I can see all the “negative” in my life and use it to help improve ME as a person NOW. For instance, people telling me “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m not smart enough to do that.” I have learned in life, if I want to do something or be someone, I have to do the work and become that person. Anything in life that is worth something takes hard work on my part. I have accepted that if it’s worth it, it will not come easy.

So, is it that easy to remove those “toxic” people from your life? I can see both sides of the coin on this one. Why not try to be an influence in their lives to help them see the negative as a positive? After all, why not lead by example? We can choose to let those people have a negative impact, or better yet, why not turn it around to be a positive? What I mean by that is, can you not turn this into a teaching moment? Or better yet, plant that seed. Travis Bradberry writes in his article about “3. The Victim, their ‘time of need’ is all the time. They don’t see tough times as opportunities to learn and grow from; instead, they see them as an out.” I take that as they can use their tough times to be the center of the limelight and to prey on your empathy. So, why do you think they do that? My thought is to get attention, to seek your empathy and have them look “The Victim.” So why not take that and turn it around for them and for yourself. My response would be, “Wow, that’s crazy. I’m sure that helped you grow stronger as a person. I mean, how could that not make you a better person for going through something like that?” Get them to thinking on the positive side. It may not turn them around completely as a “victim,” but at least you planted a seed for them to think about in the back of their minds.

Then there’s “6. The Manipulator,” this is the one I have the most problems with. I like a REAL person who has respect for themselves and for others around them. But, not everyone thinks like I do, do they? They use the fact that I am a “people-pleaser” to manipulate things to go their way. Like the time one of my supervisors manipulates me to work the time I don’t have and saying, “I thought you could be a ‘team-player’ and pick up some of this overtime that’s out there.” So, being a people-pleaser I pick up the time only to feel anger and resentment for that person being a “manipulator.”

So what about “8. The Twisted?” In my opinion, these are the evil people. Do they not see that we are on to their game? These are the people I tend to lose respect for very quickly, even try to remove these from my life. After all, they have done this their entire lives. It was most likely how they were raised, or ingrained into them either from family or a job. I’m not saying that we cannot be an example to them, but to not get wrapped up in their tangled webs.

I had some agreements with this article and some disagreements, but isn’t that normal. We all have our own opinions. Isn’t that a good thing though? When Travis Bradberry wraps up his article, he reminds us that we can “establish boundaries.” My take on these boundaries are to set the example, stop them in their tracts with a positive outlook on the situation. Take control of their chaos and set limits that you do not tolerate such toxic behavior and “Plant that seed of positive-thinking.” You can control the chaos of others in your life, but not theirs. That is something I have accepted.

So many self help books and coaches teach to start a journal for the small things in life you are grateful for. Well, I have done that and some days I struggle with being grateful. I guess that’s just life, but when I really reach down to the core of my soul I am always grateful for my husband and children. I am grateful for God who is always faithful and never gives up on me. Do you ever have that feeling that you were meant to do something, but just not sure what that something is? I mean I want to make a difference in life. It only takes one person to make a huge difference, but what is my something? I have always wanted to write, so hence the blog site. I mean I have to start somewhere, right??? 

So my grateful journal has a lot of skipped days in it. I started it to create new and healthy habits and to also remind myself daily there is always something to be grateful for. I’m quite a sentimentalist so I can drive down the road and see wildflowers and be grateful for them. I’m quite the animal person as well. Sometimes I feel I can relate with animals better than I can with humans. I love them all, but my most favorite are my dogs and my horses. I can connect with most animals to a certain point. They are forgiving and don’t hold a grudge. Every day is a new day for them. They are my therapy and most times I feel lost without animals in my life. I’m not quite sure what that means yet, but that is who I am.

I have had people come and go in my lifetime, but I feel if you stick with me and all my hangups, then you’re a keeper in my book. Isn’t that what friends are supposed to be like? They accept you for all your flaws and just keep on loving you no matter what. Unconditional love is what I’m talking about. The kind you want to have with your soul mate. And, by the way, it took me most of my lifetime to realize that your soul mate just does not walk up to you and say, “Hey, I’m your soul mate,” you have to work at building your soul mate. And it can take years. So, I’m building on my soul mate every day. I have accepted the best of him, and the worst. We have been through hard and good times, but when I see my children, I see all the good times with my husband.  

I know we all have different views in life, and mine are sometimes WAY out there, but I wanted a platform where I could express my views and have others tell me your views on different subjects I write about. This will be quite interesting because I know I will have haters out there, but isn’t that what sets us all apart? My writing skills are not the best, so bare with me on that and don’t hate. 

I am a believer in Christ. I do believe that he died on the cross for us so that we can join Him and our Heavenly Father on day and I know others to not share that belief with me. That’s okay, because I don’t know your story. I want to know your story because I always want to understand why people believe in the things they believe in. I feel it is my responsibility to portray the image of Christ through who I am and how I conduct my life. I know, God is up there shaking His head at me constantly, but most days I really try. My intentions towards people are always to be good and to be the best person I can be. To some of you that probably sounds really cheezy, but yes there are people out there just like me. Different opinions make me think about other ways to look at things and how others see things. This is my way of looking through your window to see your world and how it works. 

I want to make my blog a place for people to show me who they are and what they see. Give me a glimpse of your world and who you are with your thoughts on my views I give. This is my platform and my chance to make my voice heard with my view through my window.

Do you have a grateful journal? Do you take time each day to reflect on the things you are grateful for? The pros say it will keep you positive and focused on the good in your life. My favorite people to get motivated and pumped are Tony Robbins, Lewis Howes, Mel Robbins, Simon Sinek, John Rohn, and Brene Brown, just to name a few. And each and every one of these people start their days with things in their life they are grateful for. Pick one thing, the smallest of the smallest of things you are grateful for. It can be a flower, a beautiful day, waking up healthy, and the list goes on.

Open your minds and your hearts and let me see through your window.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton